I’m not going to write today.

I’m not going to write today. I’m dog tired and bleary from a very busy few days, so no, I’m not going to write today.

You see, I’m really good at starting things, but it’s a challenge to cross the finish line. A typical firstborn, I like to make a great impression off the bat and so pour almost every ounce of myself into that first few moments of a project/friendship/etc.  

But sometimes something odd happens. It’s like someone or something unplugs me and my power drains out. I need recharging all the time – is this how other creatives feel? Or am I but one?

dreamstime_m_12982252.jpg

So you see, I’m sorry, but I’m not going to write today.  I just don’t have it in me. My mind is slushy, not from alcohol but from sleep deprivation. Did you know that even if you’re getting sleep every night, you can still be deprived? I learned that a little while back. It makes sense now how some days I feel like I wander through, vaguely managing to get things done but having no sense of time or direction.

It’s just going to be too hard to write today. My arms are sore from working solidly yesterday and my body just wants to lie on the couch and absorb sound waves from the telly. But it’s funny you know, because we think that watching telly will help us relax, because that’s what we’ve been taught it does, but it’s a lie.

 

It saturates us, numbing us to the sensations we are otherwise surrounded by: birds, trees, rivers and seas.

 

We can watch them on the telly – even see ones that we will never see in our lifetime. That’s a good thing, right? And as we marvel at the rare insect from the Amazon crawling along our telly, we miss the wondrous marvel of the spider systematically weaving its web outside our back door.

So, I’m no going to write today. And I’m not going to watch telly. I may have to unplug the darn thing but I will resist. At least until dinner time, when me and my family gather around it to eat. We watch, we chat, we commentate on world events from our armchairs and scoff our food down. We catch up on our shows and crawl to bed after an evening of entertainment. We miss each other’s cues and go to sleep, blissfully unaware of each other’s worries.

 

But we’ve shared family time and can tick that off the list for today. That’s got to be worth something, doesn’t it?


Anyway, I just thought you had a right to know that I’m not in the mood to write today, so I’m not going to write. Thanks for understanding.

Miriam

Advertisements

6 thoughts on “I’m not going to write today.

    • Hey Janet! Thanks for sharing! Yes, so easy to feel guilty. I hate quitting too so decided to write about why I wasn’t going to write seemed like the best option. So glad it gave you encouragement!

      Like

  1. Wow Mim! I take it the first Janet wasn’t me. Your recent posts and blogs have been very challenging to me, and actually quite scary. I feel quite confronted and want to hide. Thank you for putting yourself right out there. I don’t think I would be brave enough to do that.

    Like

    • Ah, two Janets! How lovely. As weird as it may sound, I’m glad it scared you. We need to feel because society and culture can tend to desensitise us to the real emotions we need to tap into in order to grow. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

      Like

  2. Read this after I saw your link in the comments on Positive Writer site today. The repetition of this post added great rhythm to this piece. I enjoyed the irony of your words. Like you, Miriam, I have recently begun to take my writing seriously. Oh so much to learn! But I am enjoying myself in the process. Sounds like you are too.

    Like

    • Hey Melodie, lovely to receive your message today. I love your Santa post – my boys did them too and we just put our tree up on Saturday. Out came the Santas, although not for long. Teenage boys are somewhat mortified at the sight of them. Hm, go figure ;p Thanks too for your comments on this post. I was really struggling at the time and for some reason, some of my best word collections snap together in those times, so I appreciate the feedback! Merry Christmas! Blessings to you and your family.

      Like

What's your thoughts?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s